September 05, 2011

by Mike Reali in Philadelphia, PA

A couple weeks ago we ventured up to Agawam, Massachusetts, a rural New England town just across the border from Connecticut. Stephen had found a promising vehicle on ebay that failed to meet its reserve price, so he contacted the dealer and did some negotiating. It was a 1989 diesel Ford, and it looked pretty nice. So we went up with the intent of test driving it and taking it to a mechanic to have it checked out, so there wouldn’t be any surprises. We took it to three different places before we learned definitively that diesel mechanics don’t work on Saturdays. Having failed at that particular goal, the trip was no loss, since we did all get to drive it and familiarize ourselves with it in general; essentially this trundling tin can that we could potentially be spending three weeks in. It drove smoothly, and had a lot of power. The back was very spacious and in great shape, and there were tons of compartments to store things in. We all liked it. Since we still were uncertain of its mechanical health though, we decided to keep looking. The Agawam ambulance wasn’t going anywhere; we could always come back to it if we couldn’t find a better buy.

In our continued search for an ambulance, one that would guide us determinedly to our destination and also serve its deserving recipients well, Stephen came across one particular ebayer who happened to be selling a few of them. The seller, Vitaly, was based in Philadelphia. This was a stroke of luck, seeing as our other prospects at the time (besides the Agawam ambulance) were in Texas and Nebraska. So Stephen finds a phone number and he says to me, “Mike, call this shady Russian guy up. See what you can find out.” So I do, and despite him being in Pittsburgh on business, he talks to me for about a half hour, and is very helpful. I can tell right away that this guy knows ambulances and will be a good contact to have. Turns out he runs an ambulance company in Northeast Philly and deals in used ambulances all the time. I explained to him what we’re planning to do, and I told him about the Agawam ambulance that we were considering buying. He was skeptical that a vehicle that old is worth buying and won’t give us trouble in the near future. He also seemed to think that taking an American ambulance overseas and driving it 4100 miles across highways and desert was a terrible idea, because if anything went wrong with it while we were over there, (these weren’t his exact words, but in a nutshell) we’d be stranded. He said it makes more sense to spend a little more for something newer, and I felt like he wasn’t just saying this because he’s a salesman. He was talking about how if you buy something old, like an ‘89, and it needs repairs, the chances of the cost of repairs equaling or exceeding the value of the vehicle are much higher. So I asked him what I could expect to pay, minimum, for a decent, running ambulance, and he said he has a 2000 model on his lot for $3500 that he hasn’t put on ebay yet. He even said he could give us a spare engine, and although we couldn’t reasonably take an engine with us the offer showed promise.

Even though it was out of our price range, I ventured into the deep Northeast to Absolute Ambulance, and I met with Vitaly. He was a stocky Ukrainian man, with a trim goatee and a thick accent. His garage was enormous, and filled with ambulances of all kinds, in rows, like a gleaming Red Army fleet. A couple of young guys were cleaning and prepping some of them. In the back were piles of spare engines, and parts. The older stuff, say from 1989, will wind up getting scrapped because it’s of no use anymore.

I photographed the 2000 ambulance, and I drove it so we’d have a broader frame of reference when looking at others. It’s eleven years newer than the Agawam, so it’s superior in just about every way, thus less likely to encounter problems en route. It’s a fully functioning ambulance, with lights, siren, and radio all intact. The only downside to it is it has a lot less room in the back since it’s a van. Someone could buy this thing and put it back into service tomorrow. It’s only the second ambulance I’ve ever driven, and I only drove it around the lot, but I deem it to be the luxury yacht of ambulances. It was nice. Perhaps too nice.

Vitaly wouldn’t budge on the price, and remember, we still have to pay to ship it to the UK. So with the clock ticking, we set our plans to go back up to Agawam, and this time return proud ambulance owners.

I feel good about the Agawambulance. Sure, it’s twenty-two years old, it’s loud, its lights and siren don’t work, nor its AC for that matter; but it’s clean, it runs, it’s in great physical and cosmetic shape for its age, and it has a ton of room inside. If we don’t buy it it’ll either wind up in the scrap yard, or toting instruments for a high school garage band. With newer models selling for not much more, it no longer holds any promise of a bright future in America. In Mali though, it could be a rock star.

It’s the right tool for the job, and it’s going to take us to Timbuktu.